Mine did the same thing about 5 years ago when I was changing the fluid. If it is like mine, there wasn't anything for you to grab ahold of. It wasn't a square head sticking out, it was a square hole that you stuck a 1/2" ratchet in. I found that if you use a crappy extension, it is really easy to strip them out, but if you use a good high quality ratchet with a good, hardened, square shouldered 1/2" drive then it will make it easier to get out, I had to do the same thing to get the plug out of my rearend to refill it.
Anyway on the transfer case I found a piece of square stock that was bigger than the hole and ground it down to fit in the square hole perfectly and really tight, after I got those stinking things out, I went to the hardware store and bought 2 new plugs with square heads on them that stuck out instead of in. Now I can grab it with vice grips if something goes wrong.