http://spokane.craigslist.org/cto/3159159405.html
1986 F-250 Diesel 4x4 - UGLY truck for **** people - $1500 (Spokane Valley)
Date: 2012-07-23, 9:31PM PDT
Reply to: see below [Errors when replying to ads?]
I have an '86 F-250 4x4 with the 6.9L diesel and a 4 speed manual transmission. It kicks ass. It's an ugly truck for **** people. Ugly people, stop reading now, this isn't the truck for you. If you're ****, then here are ten reasons it's the perfect truck for you:
1. This truck is so ugly that it makes you look good. See the first photo: That's me. Now see the second photo... That's also me. Hot dayyyymmn!
2. The bald tires are excellent on dry, smooth pavement. When offroad, you can show off to your buddies by spinning a wheel on both the front and rear axles and still moving nowhere. Boom: 4 wheel drive.
3. The wiring has so many butt splices that you could call it a J-Lo job.
4. Ugliness is a great theft deterrent. Nobody will steal it. **** addicts will walk right by it and steal the Yugo at the next meter instead. **Not Guaranteed.
5. The bed seems to be able to carry an endless number of empty beer cans.
6. The passenger side of the truck sits like 3" higher than the other. So you can park two wheels on the curb and be level.
7. The radio doesn't work, so you can force your passenger to listen to you rant about The Godfather. Hopefully you are ranting to passengers who don't level the truck out.
8. I fixed *most* of the oil leaks. I left the worst of them as an engine safety feature - As long as it's still leaking, then it's not out of oil yet. It's a foolproof way to add oil-pressure-idiot-light functionality to a truck that has a fully functional oil pressure gauge. But **** people don't use no stinkin' gauges.
9. The speedometer varies by as much as 10mph between 25 and 45. So if you get pulled over for speeding, just say "I was doing 25 a quarter of a second ago." You could probably rig up a camera so that you'd have evidence.
10. I am selling the truck because I need the money to go on a dragon-slaying quest. These particular dragons eat puppies. So you can drive down the road with the peace of mind that you ultimately helped me save puppies.
If you've gotten this far, then you're ****. And if you're a lady, read a little further and you'll have my digits. Hopefully you like drawing dragons, because it appears to be one of my shortcomings.
I guess that even if you're not a lady, you can still call me, to you know, buy my truck.
-Matt
(509)251-6045
1986 F-250 Diesel 4x4 - UGLY truck for **** people - $1500 (Spokane Valley)
Date: 2012-07-23, 9:31PM PDT
Reply to: see below [Errors when replying to ads?]
I have an '86 F-250 4x4 with the 6.9L diesel and a 4 speed manual transmission. It kicks ass. It's an ugly truck for **** people. Ugly people, stop reading now, this isn't the truck for you. If you're ****, then here are ten reasons it's the perfect truck for you:
1. This truck is so ugly that it makes you look good. See the first photo: That's me. Now see the second photo... That's also me. Hot dayyyymmn!
2. The bald tires are excellent on dry, smooth pavement. When offroad, you can show off to your buddies by spinning a wheel on both the front and rear axles and still moving nowhere. Boom: 4 wheel drive.
3. The wiring has so many butt splices that you could call it a J-Lo job.
4. Ugliness is a great theft deterrent. Nobody will steal it. **** addicts will walk right by it and steal the Yugo at the next meter instead. **Not Guaranteed.
5. The bed seems to be able to carry an endless number of empty beer cans.
6. The passenger side of the truck sits like 3" higher than the other. So you can park two wheels on the curb and be level.
7. The radio doesn't work, so you can force your passenger to listen to you rant about The Godfather. Hopefully you are ranting to passengers who don't level the truck out.
8. I fixed *most* of the oil leaks. I left the worst of them as an engine safety feature - As long as it's still leaking, then it's not out of oil yet. It's a foolproof way to add oil-pressure-idiot-light functionality to a truck that has a fully functional oil pressure gauge. But **** people don't use no stinkin' gauges.
9. The speedometer varies by as much as 10mph between 25 and 45. So if you get pulled over for speeding, just say "I was doing 25 a quarter of a second ago." You could probably rig up a camera so that you'd have evidence.
10. I am selling the truck because I need the money to go on a dragon-slaying quest. These particular dragons eat puppies. So you can drive down the road with the peace of mind that you ultimately helped me save puppies.
If you've gotten this far, then you're ****. And if you're a lady, read a little further and you'll have my digits. Hopefully you like drawing dragons, because it appears to be one of my shortcomings.
I guess that even if you're not a lady, you can still call me, to you know, buy my truck.
-Matt
(509)251-6045
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